On Monday, the 17th 10. of 2022, after an intense night, a baby girl joined us at 7:02 AM. Big like her daddy (4070g) and loud like her mommy ♥️
The long version of the story:
In the evening, around eleven, I realized that the occasional mini contractions, which had been present on and off all week before that, were becoming increasingly regular. And gradually more intense. Far from the strong ones, but I still had to stop, concentrate, and breathe through them. They were still rare and not very long. So we enjoyed our time at home between them. We even prepared another dinner. It was a great idea, as I really had the energy for the birth. Around two, we decided it might be a good idea to start heading toward the maternity hospital, as I wanted to get into the water, and we knew the whole procedure could take a while before I actually got there. So we set off. The contractions were regular, about every 3-4 minutes, lasting around a minute. We arrived at the hospital (I breathed through a good one right in front of the doors), I went to the delivery block alone, changed into a gown, waited… and the contractions were nowhere to be found. Just one every now and then. Everything calmed down. Even the ones I did feel were barely detected by the CTG. We filled out all the papers, recorded the CTG, and checked the dilation.
Two centimeters. What a shock!
Oh boy, this is going to take foooorever before I give birth if nothing is happening (at Friday’s check-up, I was also supposedly two centimeters dilated and already soft back then). After a good hour in the delivery room, they wanted to put me in the ward to wait for things to start happening more seriously. I expressed a wish to rather go home (with my assumption that it would take a while anyway before I’d need to come back). Since we live 15 minutes away, they granted my wish. We got home, and I told myself, fine, I’ll go to bed and try to fall asleep. I lay there for a few minutes and then things started happening for real. Serious contractions. I got up, went to the living room to breathe and move, and let my husband sleep. It became more and more intense, so I decided to try showering first. The hot water felt amazing between individual contractions, it relaxed me, but it was hard to stand the whole time. I decided to just run a bath in our tub at home and get in. Before that, I went to wake up N. and told him to come because I needed him. Because the contractions were already very strong and I needed support. And since I was getting into the water, I couldn’t just keep jumping out. After a few contractions, my husband said: “Uf, two more and we’re heading to the hospital.” Really? “Yes, I think so.” He went to wake up his mother so she could watch our first son. I got dressed and ready. I couldn’t even put shoes on, I just slipped on some flip-flops and we left. One more serious contraction on the way to the car. I tried to be quiet so I wouldn’t wake the whole street, haha. We left home around six, a bit before.
The drive. I don’t remember much of it, only that I kept telling him to drive fast during contractions. In between, I’d say there’s no need to rush so much, since I won’t be giving birth yet anyway, this will still take a while. We reached the emergency entrance. A free parking spot right in front, just for us. Onto the wheelchair and running toward the delivery ward. We got upstairs, the midwife was already waiting for me at the door: “Are you the one for the pool?” Yes! Let’s go to the delivery room. Change, lie down, so they can see where I’m at.
I’m just praying it’s more than 4 cm.
Ma’am, this is 7 cm, almost 8! I don’t know if there will be time for the pool. There won’t even be time for an enema, which is a requirement for the pool. I said, can I have a shower then? Yes, of course. We went under the shower, on the ball. Top, top, top! The hot water relaxed me. The ball gave me the chance to move, which felt good. Being upright too. My husband was behind me, massaging me, pouring water over me, encouraging me…
The wonderful midwife made sure everything ran as it should. When she judged it would soon be time for the pushing stage, she said I should move to the bed. As I stood up, I felt my water break. The midwife handed me !warm! towels to dry off. On the way to the bed, another very strong contraction hit me, and I just collapsed to the floor, but with encouragement that it would be really good to get to the bed, I moved with their help. There, they immediately put me on my side, but it didn’t feel right. I turned onto my back. And the second midwife made sure I had one leg extended and the other bent, and that I was slightly tilted (my husband was also paying attention so I wouldn’t be directly on my back, so the baby would have room for birth).
And then the urge to push came. I didn’t follow the midwife’s advice to pull myself forward toward my leg, as I felt I needed to be straight. Same with holding my breath while pushing. I breathed while pushing. And that way, I lasted much longer through one “push.” I only pushed her out during my contractions. In between, I had time to breathe and rest, and then again! Together with the midwives, we talked about how I was going to poop. “Poop a little more.” It sounds funny now, but that’s really what it feels like. And this time, I was completely without that worry of “what if I poop.” I won’t. But I will “poop” the baby out. And that’s what we want. I relaxed everything. Throughout the birth, I kept telling myself: relax, relax. Shoulders down. Move. Relax. And suddenly the midwife said: “I can see hair!” What? Does she have a lot? “Yes, dark long hair!” What? Oh wow, husband, she takes after you! And a little more and my daughter was on my chest! Born at 7:02, daughter R. Our second child.
What a crazy experience. What a beautiful birth. I remember everything, my mind was completely clear. I was full of energy afterward. Happy.
I gave birth without a single stitch. 10 minutes after the birth, the doctor arrived, but there wasn’t much more to do; the midwife just showed her the placenta.
Thank you, thank you for such good preparation. As a second-time mom, I’m really grateful we chose you, because you prepared us for the most beautiful hospital birth. For real situations, not some ideal scenarios. For the fact that I was completely open to giving birth in the water or not. The midwife mentioned a few times how this was one of the more beautiful births she had been a part of, that she could see how prepared we were, how confident we were, and how she wished for more births like this. She admired my list of birth wishes; her favorite point was: Watch over my perineum, just like you did the first time, and I know you know how. She mentioned a few times that the wishes were so beautifully written that she was happy to try and accommodate them if at all possible.
We were so confident and in sync with my husband that we can only thank you for all the knowledge passed on (and the extended access for viewing—it was worth it!). My husband was more sure of himself and really, really listened to me, tried to see what felt good, and followed his instinct. Above all, he was carefully by my side the whole time. He sat behind me during the pushing stage so I could feel him near me, that support.
As mentioned, after experiencing birth again, we feel the preparation is great for confidence during a hospital birth; we felt competent and that we were really leading the process, and the midwife confirmed this, telling us to just keep going like that… To the extensive preparation, I would add something about breastfeeding. That it’s painful at the beginning when the nipples aren’t used to that kind of friction, and that you need to shove the breast into the baby’s mouth so it’s really deep in there to trigger the sucking reflex. Also, after talking to a cousin who was very surprised by this, we think it might be good to emphasize it, as we prepare well for the birth, but we run out of steam for the reality that follows.
The second thing relates to leg cramps that pregnant women often experience. When A. had already taken a lot of magnesium, she asked her gynecologist what else she could do. He advised a short daily leg massage. My husband has a little bit of work every evening now, but since then I haven’t had a single cramp, except on the days when he was away for work and I didn’t get a massage.
Once again, thank you so much for the rich transfer of knowledge! We took away a lot, or rather, gained a huge amount of trust, which is what counts here so that everything can go more the right way for the baby and the mother. We recommend this preparation to everyone, but we do warn them about the intensity, as you really have to commit—it’s time-consuming but comprehensive.
Thank you and good luck with your wonderful mission in the future! And we have to take advantage of the time while both kids are sleeping 🙂
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